Ok, ok, I may have crossed the line. I get it! Seriously, I do!

I don’t know that it’s the Elf on the Shelf that’s the prankster as much as it is the parent behind the “magic” of the Elf on the Shelf. I mean, honestly, my kids love to pretend. What child doesn’t? And Christmas is filled with so much fun, if, you take advantage of it! *Can you hear my Bond villain laugh?

So, maybe, this dad went a little overboard. I’ll let the readers decide.

Dad Can We Build a Fort?

My precious, oldest, loving, and pure hearted daughter asked me, “Dad, can we build a fort?” I had already drank a cup of coffee and was feeling energetic anyways so I said, “Sure! But, you’re cleaning it up afterwards!” (it’s 11:15am the next day and it’s still not cleaned up). What precedes to happen is I witness Harper and Harrison build the lamest looking small fort on the history of this planet. So, like the good good father that I am, I tear it down and build a bigger and more historic fort. The kids were happy!

The Plan

I worked another hour downstairs in my office and noticed that the kids were behaving very well. I peeked into their fort and they didn’t even notice. They were so into watching PBS Kids on the iPad that they had no idea that dad was literally looking over their heads. I began to think, “I bet I could move the elf into their tent without them even knowing!”

I snuck down the steps a few Barbie toys from Harper’s room and setup a small table, chair, and a bowl of “beans and rice” (Dave Ramsey would be proud) for the elf inside of the fort. The kids didn’t see or hear me! My plan is working! Then I preceded to insert the elf into the chair where he is looking right at them. Still, they didn’t see or hear me!

I walked into the room and began to laugh as I told Sydney my plan. Then, it dawned on me, “I can make the elf talk to the kids!”

The Elf Talks

I had no intentions of freaking the kids out. My plan was so perfect that I almost ruined it by the amount of times that I would bust out laughing before I had even gone through with the plan.

How did I make the elf talk? It’s simple! I hid a blue tooth speaker that was connected to my iPhone under the cover near the elf in the fort. Then Sydney and I watched from upstairs as the elf began talking to Harper and Harrison. Here is the YouTube video that I used. *Note: I only played it for 10 seconds and would pause for effect.

What happened next was beyond my wildest dreams. The kids almost tore the fort down trying to get out of there. They ran into the family room and begin in a scared manner telling their mom that the elf was talking to them and that he called Harper cute! I’m in the bedroom crying at how well this worked!

They have Sydney go downstairs to hear the elf talk. Sure enough, he does! “Hi guys!” he says. Sydney plays along. Harper is terrified, however, Harrison is loving it! Harrison walks up to the elf and says, “Sparkles (that’s his name), this is my sister, Harper, you think she’s cute?” I play some more of the video, “I’m trying to be cool so don’t ruin that,” the elf says.

Harrison runs upstairs to get me. Like a typical in a Christmas movie I play it off like I don’t believe. You know the ole “Santa and Elves are fake” routine. Sadly, the elf doesn’t talk for me. Maybe because I didn’t believe. Who knows?

Damage Control

Although my plan worked flawlessly, like any controversial plan, I had to do damage control. Sparkles had to leave the house for the North Pole for the night because Harper was freaked out. I think she was starting to believe that her parents were moving the elf around (lame, right?) until she heard the elf speak. She said, “Dad, how can the elf speak?”

This reminds me of a couple of years ago when it had snowed in Murfreesboro in December. The kids and I loaded up in the SUV to go look at Christmas lights and see if we could see any reindeer. While in a subdivision I stopped the SUV as we all looked at this beautiful house covered in lights. Then, to freak me out, Harper begins screaming, “There’s the reindeer!!!” Sure enough as I had stopped, about 20 deer had crossed the road and were standing right in front of our vehicle. Literally standing right in front of us in the snow. The kids were convinced that this was Santa’s reindeer. I told Sydney when I got home, “If the kids ever doubted whether Santa is real. After tonight, it’ll be a while before they question that thought.” I think the talking elf has stopped her questioning for a while.

It Was Worth It

Harrison had a blast at least. This kid isn’t afraid of anything. Harper is still talking about her experience today, but, not in a scared manner. She was actually sad that he left for the North Pole that night because she thought he was mad at her. The good news is that he left her a note on the back of the one you see below saying, “Harper, I’m not mad and I love you.”

Anyways, I hope that you enjoyed reading this. I had the time of my life.